In the past year, two of my best friends had their first baby. It is exciting because now they “get it.” For the longest time, I was the only one with a kid. Which also made me the lucky winner of unsolicited advice and guilt trips for missing a bachelorette weekend. (I was still breastfeeding and my baby was literally 2 months old, but I digress…)
We got together recently and one of them apologized for ignoring the fact that I have had kids for the past 8 years. ha! It was nice to hear, but it never really annoyed me. They were in a totally different mindset and I understood.
It has been funny hearing their “new mom realizations” over the past year. Which brought me back to when I was a new mom with all those crazy thoughts going through my head.
10 thoughts every new mom has:
1. What did I do with my time before I had kids?– I used to think I didn’t have time to get anything done. I can’t workout, I am too busy. I don’t have time to cook! Then I had kids. And I wondered what the heck I did before I had them. I should have had a model body and been meal planning like a boss. I mean… I took NAPS for goodness sakes! NAPS!
2. I really don’t need that much sleep.– Before kids I always said I needed my sleep. After having my son, I quickly realized I can function on way less sleep than I thought. When you don’t have a choice, you make it work.
3. I hate my husband!– My husband and I were together for about 10 years before we had our first baby. We never fought. However, soon after having a child, it became clear to me. I really do not like this man. I found myself saying things like, HOW DO YOU NOT HEAR THE BABY CRYING? WHAT IS SO HARD ABOUT GIVING THE BABY A BATH? WHY ARE YOU TOUCHING ME? 😉 Sleep deprivation and the stress of having a new baby can be tough on any marriage. But this will pass… and you will love your husband once again. Eventually.
4. Kids are expensive!– It didn’t take long to realize that kids cost way more than I initially thought. Diapers, doctors visits and daycare… there is so much to pay for and it quickly adds up.
5. I miss warm food.– Once I had kids I realized that I took for granted a lot of things, including warm food. Not to mention actually chewing my food, instead of scarfing it down as quickly as possible… while standing up.
6. Breastfeeding hurts.– Like for real. Why didn’t anyone warn me about how badly breastfeeding would hurt? Also, very few people told me how HARD it would be as well.. I just assumed you just put the baby on the boob and boom. Nope.
7. Parenting is hard.– I didn’t think having kids would be a cakewalk, but I can admit now I wasn’t prepared for how difficult it would be. I second guessed every decision. I worried if my baby was growing okay, sleeping properly, eating enough. With parenting, you reach a level of worry & anxiety that you didn’t know existed.
8. I am never getting a moment to myself again.– There is a moment every parent has when they feel like, “Holy s**t, I have 18 years of this.” You try to remember the last time you were able to relax, but can’t. Once you become a mom, you just don’t stop. Even now, with my kids being a little bit older… I still feel like I never really stop. It is starting to get easier, but man… is it different.
9. I hate my new body.– We are so accustomed to seeing superstars bounce right back from pregnancies, that we secretly think that we will be able to do the same. But after the baby comes and a few months go by, you quickly realize that your new body is here to stay for awhile. I never really thought I was a vain person, but my new bod did take some getting used to.
10. I can’t believe I am a mom.– This is probably the most common thought I had. When I would look at my son or daughter I would think, “WOW. I can’t believe I am a mom. I can’t believe these perfect little people are MINE.”
I feel so lucky every day to have my kids, they are the joy of my life. As they get older, things are getting a bit easier. If you are a new mommy, I hope you can relate to these thoughts and I want you to know that you are doing an amazing job, momma!!
What did I do with my time before I had kids? YES! I ask this all the time.
It is baffling really… I mean I could do WHATEVER I wanted. Yet, I did nothing. ha!
Although I didn’t give birth, after nannying this week I’ve been wondering about many of these myself – especially since my husband and I hope to have kids soon!
You will love being a mom, but there are hard moments too! 😉
Yaaaaas #1! What did I spend all of my time doing and where did I spend my money?
Yeah the time thing is something my husband and I talk about all the time. Like, what the heck were we doing?? ha!
Love this post so much – love how honest and raw this post is! Crazy how a baby can change everything in life! I’m bookmarking this as a reminder for when I become a mom someday! You are the cutest mom! Thank you for sharing!
Thanks for stopping by! Being a mom is wonderful in so many ways, but sometimes it is just nice to admit this stuff is hard! 😉
Exactly! Every single one of these is true!
Right?! I am so happy to hear other moms can relate! 🙂
You are so right, I have had every single one of those thoughts multiple times since having my little man. Especially the ‘I hate my new body’ one.
Yeah.. my mushy tummy took some getting used to, but I rock it now. (well, kind of.. ha)
Every. Single. One. Of. These. These all go through my head ever day!
I am so glad you could relate.. and trust me momma… you are NOT alone! 😉
All so true! And, also when is the house EVER going to be quiet again. I remember being so overwhelmed by the volume. But, I have 5 so maybe that is due to the number of kids, not sure. Love this. We need to remind each other that we are all in this motherhood thing together and while the moments aren’t always Instagram perfect. They absolutely make up the BEST memories of our lives.
Haha yes 5 kids may make it a little louder at your home.. but what a blessing to have a home filled with so much love! and I am sure craziness too… 😉
Absolutely relating to #1 and #8. Especially #8, since I’m an introvert who really longs for that quiet thinking time. Luckily my husband is wonderful about taking the kids when I need to get out of the house and write or just go have coffee by myself. Great list!
I grew up as an only child, so I need my alone time too! We are lucky to have husbands that understand that!
Absolute bullseye! I have had every single one of these thoughts! I love your honesty!
Thank you! I am glad you could relate.. it is a little scary posting something so honest, I am glad so many people agreed! ha!
Absolutely! I have had each of these thoughts! I just thought I don’t need that much sleep this morning!
I am glad you can relate!! I hope you are having a wonderful week!
I still try to convince myself I don’t need that much sleep … 5 years later… 🙂
Me too!! After 8 years and two kids, I am finally getting a few full nights of sleep here and there. It is glorious! ha!
Preach it girl. This is spot on!!!!
Thank you!! haha! I hope you are having a great week!
Mentally preparing for all of this! I am due in June! Thanks for being honest lol
haha this is not for mommies to be! Sorry if I scared you… I’m sure this stuff won’t happen to you 😉
Yep I’ve had overwhelming feelings like this (speicifally 3 & 8). But then there are those amazing moments as a family and as a mother that make everything SO worth it! Loved this post!
I think everyone has at least a few of these. Hearing from my friends with new babies and reassuring them that what they were feeling was normal reminded me about how I dealt with the exact same things!
These are great! I’m definitely with you on the “I hate my husband” sentiment! Haha! 🙂 Thankfully it was fleeting!
That is good! 😉 haha! We were more prepared for it by the time we had our second child, so the hate wasn’t as strong!