I decided to write this post since a number of my friends are having their second baby, and have asked me what I did to “prepare” Hudson for his little sister’s arrival. Many people don’t do anything different or ‘prep’ their other kids before welcoming a sibling, and that is totally fine. However, I was terrified of Hudson feeling neglected or jealous once he became a big brother, so I did a number of things to try and make the transition a little bit easier. I think because I grew up as an only child the idea of having a new sibling brought into the home was totally foreign to me. (maybe I was a bit scared for both of us!)
When I (finally) became pregnant with Mila, Hudson was almost 5 years old. So he had a pretty good run on his own. However, he had been asking for a baby brother or sister for awhile, so I knew he would be be happy… at least at first.
When we told him I was pregnant we gave him a little book called, “I’m a Big Brother.” I took a picture of him holding the book and that is how I made my social media pregnancy ‘announcement.’ He would ask to read it almost every night and I thought it was a good book since it talked about the baby needing lots of attention… and the benefits of being older. (“Babies can’t have pizza and ice cream, but I can!”)
He looks so little here!! |
About two months before my due date, I took Hudson to build-a-bear and asked him to make one for his baby sister. I knew going into the store that I was only going to get the gift for the baby… NOTHING for him. I wanted to prep him for the fact that not everything would be his anymore. Once we got there he starting asking for every single bear. But I would just say, “Sorry bud, we are here to get a gift for your sister so she can remember how excited you were to meet her.” Finally, he selected a Hello Kitty bear and went through the process of cleaning it, talking to the little heart that they stuff inside and creating the birth certificate. In the end, he was a little bummed that he didn’t get a toy, but he was excited to have a gift for his sister that he selected all by himself.
Doing his best “Hello Kitty” wink! |
Donnie’s mom watched Hudson while we were in the hospital, so when she brought him later that afternoon, Mila was sleeping. This allowed my husband and I to focus on Hudson and ask him all the fun things he did at his sleepover at Grandma & Papa’s. He was excited to see us, but quickly turned his attention to his sister. He was a bit pensive at first, but was super excited when I asked him if he wanted to hold her.
First picture together!! Mila was just a few hours old! |
I also brought to the hospital a small gift for him that was from his sister. It was a toy I knew he had been wanting and it had a lot of little pieces and busy things for him to do… to keep him from getting bored while he was at the hospital. (since… let’s face it… the sister thing got old in about 5 minutes) I told him that I went shopping and told his sister to “Kick twice,” when we walked by something he would like. He was so surprised that she knew exactly what he had been asking for.
When guests came to visit, I discreetly asked them to acknowledge Husdon first before going right to the baby. So when people arrived, they would all ask him a few questions… how is school or how does he like being a big brother.. stuff like that. He would chat it up for a bit and go off to play, then we would all gush over the baby.
He was a great big brother from the start! |
Most of these things I did to ease my OWN fears of how he would feel about having a little sister, after being our old child for 5 years. I will say, it was a very easy transition… I have never seen any major signs of jealousy from him towards his sister. And he still likes to remind her how he made her that Hello Kitty doll.
My two cuties!! |
Bev Feldman says
Aw, this is so sweet! I'll have to reread it one day ๐ (But not for awhile!) My sister and I are about the same age difference as Hudson and Mila. I was so excited to have a baby sister! I always envisioned having my kids the same # of years apart, though now that I'm a mom I'll probably wait a little less. I hope Eve is as great a big sibling as Hudson is!
Lauren says
Yes, I did want them a bit closer together in age.. but apparently God had other plans! ๐ I am sure your sweet girl will make a fantastic big sister!
MrsMuffinTop says
So sweet!! When my #2 rolled around, #1 was only 17 months old! When #3 came, we did similar things. You're a great mom!
Lauren says
That is so awesome that they were so close in age! I have thought about 3.. but the thoughts are VERY fleeting! ๐
homemadeexperience.com says
Great ideas! My babe was only 2 when our second rolled around, but I feel like it was a great time. She was young enough that she was still in her own little world, but old enough to still feel the attention shift. We started doing individual mommy-daughter and daddy-daughter dates to even out the attention from both of us, and I also tried to include her in any little thing I did with the newborn. It all works out! Great post ๐
Lauren says
I always think that seems like the perfect age difference… I was actually really worried since Hudson was older about the transition… hence all my crazy sibling preparedness!
Jennifer - The Deliberate Mom says
Aww, you did some lovely things. There is a 3 1/2 year difference between my girls. We purchased "big sister" books, talked with her, and even listened to her baby name suggestions – "Baby" was her favourite. LOL
Thanks for sharing these wonderful suggestions.
I loved seeing these photos too – so sweet!
xoxo
Lauren says
Hudson wanted to name her Lily and we were actually really really close to naming her that!!
Jennifer - The Deliberate Mom says
Aww, how sweet. My husband wanted to name our son Kermit (and my oldest daughter was on board with that name)! I'm sooooo glad we had another girl and not a boy!
Thank you for sharing (and for linking up to the #SHINEbloghop).
Wishing you a lovely day.
xoxo
Megan Van Weelde says
So sweet! Good tips. We got the same book and we also had the baby give big brother a gift. Baby gave him a little car and a big bro shirt.
Lauren says
that is a great idea.. the tshirt!
happyandhumble says
I am an only child as well and this sibling rivalry stuff is baffling to me..Lol. I love the idea of having family members acknowledge the older sibling first. That could help to prevent any acting out for lack of attention.
Lauren says
I am an only child too, which is why I was so worried I think about Hudson being okay with the whole thing! ha!
katie // a touch of teal says
I don't have kids yet, but I love getting advice from parents! thanks for sharing :]
Lauren says
Thanks for stopping over! Hope you are having a great week so far!
Talitha Haynes says
I have seen where most children are so jealous of the newborns. This is a great post for 2nd, 3rd time moms.
Lauren says
Thanks Talitha! ๐
Melissa (M) says
We have the I'm a Big Sister version of the book, it is a great one.
Lauren says
Yes that book was a big hit!
Jeannine O'Neil says
I too am an only child so when I talk to my husband or mother-in-law about him and his brother growing up it always amazes me. Even to this day, everything is 50-50. If my Brother in law need money, we get money. She bought him a new mattress, we got a new mattress. You were so thoughtful about making sure Hudson didn't feel left out. I love the gift idea too. Especially the two kick piece. You really thought everything out and judging from pics, they look like they get along really well. Great advice for those expecting #2!
Lauren says
My husband also has a brother and they are really close in age… and their mom does the same thing!! The whole sibling dynamic is still baffling to me. ๐
Aubrey Aquino says
He seems like such a good big brother!! I didn't prep my #1 for #2 since he wasn't even 1 yet…and while at first there were no issues of jealousy…they kinda crept in and they now jockey for position! I do like some of the things you did though to get him ready..great strategy!
Lauren says
yes it was easy to prep since he was so much older, I def wanted them closer in age though! You will be happy later, my husband and his brother are 18 months apart and they are best friends!!
sonia | bragging babies says
I love how you got your son on board and excited about the arrival of your new baby. It's important to get family and friends all geared up as well because it's also an adjustment for adults….even moms. I so wanted to have another baby after my son was born. When my husband and I decided it was the right time I cried. I knew that the little family, the three of us, was going to be a cherished memory and we would be moving on to something new and beautiful. I am totally grateful, blessed and happy, with my two boys. My older son adjusted well. After a few restless nights after the baby came home from the hospital, my older son saw the light and I guess decided that his little brother would be a great new playmate after all.
Lauren says
I cried after I dropped my son off at his grandma's since we had to check into the hospital really early to have her.. I felt the same way!
Nicole McGregor says
all good advice!
CourtneyLynne says
Such great advice!!!! I plan on my daughter being an only child, but if that ever changes I now have some fabulous info ๐
Lauren says
I was an only child.. and I LOVED it!!! ๐
Alyssa says
This is so great! I just had my first, my husband is in dental school, and I cannot imagine having another one and doing most of it on my own. But these are some really great tips. Your kids are super cute!
Lauren says
Yes just give yourself some time.. but maybe you are one and done, which is great too! ๐
Jennifer Humphries says
Adjusting to a new baby in the house takes time for even the adults and little people are no different. You did some lovely things to help with this transition and these are all great suggestions.
Lauren says
Yes, so true!
Mindy Shock says
Such good tips! I especially like the one about having guests acknowledge your eldest first! Thanks for the post!
Lauren says
yes, that made a really big difference and everyone understood right away
Ash @ Dirt In My Shoes says
I love your story about giving him a gift from his sister at the hospital. Brilliant!! Thanks for all of the great ideas!
Lauren says
It was a hit! Thanks for stopping by and have a great week.
Rachael Boley says
This is just so so precious!!!! What great ways to prep him and make him feel special and loved and assured. They are like two little peas in a pod. Adorable!!
Lauren says
They are seriously bananas. Love them though!! I hope all is well with you!
kristi@mustbeamomblog.com says
Love the build a bear idea… I would've been so tempted to cave and just let him get a bear too- Great job Momma! My son is barely 3 and my daughter barely 1 … I am loving watching them become friends! I would love to work with you one day if you are interested! My blog is new http://www.mustbeamomblog.com Please pop on over!
Lauren says
Trust me, it was REALLY hard for me not to buy him one!! I am such a sucker! i am going to check out your blog now! Thanks for stopping over.
Motherhood and Merlot says
I live the first pictures of siblings together. Now that my oldest is three, I'll be interested to see her reaction to the new babies!
Lauren says
Your girls will be such awesome big sisters!
Tarynn Playle says
This is the sweetest post. It got me all teary-eyed-probably because my family experienced something similar when my son was born. Sounds like Hudson is such a great big brother! As always, love the photos too!
Lauren says
Its so crazy since I remember it all so clearly… really like it was yesterday! (meanwhile it is all such a haze with my first!! I was such a cluster!)
Alanna @ Alanna and Company says
Great post! Thank you for linking up with us yesterday.
Jasmine says
Such a cute post. I remember when I had to prepare my oldest for when I was pregnant with his brother. A lot of work because he was only 2, so he didn't really understand. But he got it. Thank you linking up with us yesterday.
Melissa Matters says
That is a sweet idea to go to build a bear. I had my daughter pick out a little bear for her brother too.
Andrea says
I've never heard about the built-a-bear visit. I love the gifts from the newest baby though. That always adds something fun! I'm so glad to hear he is such a sweet brother! ๐ I'll definitely be coming back for clues when we start adding to our family! Thanks for linking up with us on Tuesday! ๐
Constance Jones says
Great Tips– I will be sure to share them around! LOVE IT!
Aileen Brian Van Pelt says
Love this! Great tips, some of which we also did – we have the Big Sister book! Coincidentally, I was looking through Facebook pictures last night and reminiscing of when the girls were babies. We have a video of Monkey kissing my belly the night before Lil Tank was born and saying "I'll see you soon." So sweet.
Kristen Hewitt says
We did a gift too from the older sister! And it is SO important to involve the little ones in helping with their new baby brother or sister!
NotimeforDIY says
This is great! You did a wonderful job of including him! I remember I was worried about my daughter when our son was on the way and she showed signs while I was pregnant that she would not like to have a sibling but the day he was born, she was all smiles and she loves him to pieces.
Shantel Jones says
So sweet! I have 4 little's and your tips are spot on, thanks for sharing!